Thoughts On Gift Giving
May 28, 2009 – 11:41 amSome people love to get gifts, and some people love to give gifts. In my experience these two types of people are are one in the same. There’s a great book on relationships called “The Five Love Languages“, and I highly recommend it. In that book one of the five love languages is gift giving, and once you read the book you’ll start to identify the love languages of others.
It seems odd to me, but I don’t like receiving gifts at all. And since I also don’t like clutter, I feel that it’s wasteful for my family to waste their time and money on something that I don’t want. I would much rather spend the day with friends and family doing something than I would exchanging gifts. And I think the Christmas season is way to material and gift focused. I have no issue giving gifts and no issue affording to give gifts since we save up throughout the year. My issue, however, is the “need” to give so many gifts to so many people. And my family isn’t even that large. 1 sibling on my side and 2 on my wife’s. But when you include parents, nieces/nephews, etc it gets to be about 15-20 people.
The other problem I have is that I typically end up getting a bunch of stuff I don’t want. Nowadays I’m much more specific with my requests, sending URL’s or specific descriptions of items. The other difficulty is that I like books best, and other people can’t buy me books because they don’t know what I’ll like or what I’ve already read.
What I would really like to do is draw names within each family, and then still get individual gifts for any children under 12. That way we could all get a much nicer single gift, not spend so much time and money buying dozens of smaller gifts, and still make the holidays fun for younger children.
Do any of you share these feelings? After proofreading this post it seems like I’m a bit too focused on “me” in this whole conversation? Should I just shut up and go along with what my family (parents and siblings that is) prefer?
If You Liked This Post Then Please Check These Out...
|
7 Responses to “Thoughts On Gift Giving”
I agree. I always want to say that I don’t want anything for Christmas, but I know that some of my family members show love by giving gifts. It’s an odd problem.
My wife’s family draws names, but her family is a good six times the size of mine!
By Chris on May 28, 2009
That is exactly what we do for Christmas. The adults draw names and we set a limit of no more than $50. The little ones (3) get something small and from their list. One year the gifts had to be handmade or mostly so. Another year they were silly gifts. The time spent with family is much more important than the money spent ON family. Just being together works for us.
Thanks.
By Bobbi on May 29, 2009
I agree with you. The way I see it why do we all wait for holidays to give gifts? It seems crazy to me. Holidays are designed to spend with people you care about and not focusing on gifts. Drawing names I feel is a good idea. I also feel that volunteering during a holiday like soup kitchens etc… expreses the true meaning of giving.
By Joanne Olivieri on May 29, 2009
Right on! It’s a rare day that I need any more junk, thanks. Whenever I do need something, I buy or make it, and so it’s pretty hard for someone to come up with a gift that I can use. And I just hate it when people ask me what I want for [fill in the blank]. They won’t take “nothing” or “your company” for an answer…and what can you say?
By Funny about Money on May 31, 2009
I agree! I have gift giving and receiving issues. Honestly, my family doesn’t really need anything, especially my children. They have more toys than we know what to do with. Many of their gifts from last Christmas remain unused. It just seems like such a terrible waste. I’m not sure how to deal with this problem though. My husband and I both come from large families – and they love to give gifts. I do not want to seem ungrateful.
By Jennifer on Jun 3, 2009
Funny, this is pretty much the exact same thing I was saying last year. I did manage to convince everyone to just exchange names. We also left it very open so as not to cramp anyone’s style. You are ‘obligated’ only for the one gift among adults and then any kids. If you want to give more that’s perfectly acceptable and no one is allowed to be upset that they didn’t get ‘extra’ gifts. We also put small wish lists on the papers with the names. This too was optional. One Uncle likes to be surprised, and I tend to ignore these and give handmade items.
By Slinky on Jun 5, 2009