Preparations To Become A One-Income Family
October 28, 2008 – 5:20 amWith my wifey pregnant, it’s time to prepare for her income to disappear. We agreed and worked our best to engineer our lives around this coming change, and it has made all the difference.
I’ve harped on this before, but I hate fixed costs. All on-going payments bug me, because it effectively raises our family financial run-rate forever. Some of these expenses can be cut if necessary (like telephone, cable, a Netflix membership, ect), but others are difficult. Moving to a smaller home, for example, would be very costly, especially in an inopportune time (like now for me). And who wants to move with a pregnant wife? She’s tired all the time already! 
Here’s my list of recommended actions:
- Agree on who will stay home with the kiddo(s). I’d love to stay home with the kids, but I’m sure it’s less work for me to just keep my day job!
- Figure out what the new stay-at-home spouse was really earning. This will help you decide if your spouse should ever consider going back to work. You many find that they weren’t earning that much after taking taxes, job expenses, tolls, and gas into account.
- Agree on any shifts in responsibilities. Most stay at home parents function as chief family officers, and as such do a large number of tasks. Will that person take over managing the budget, buying groceries, planning vacations? This is not a recommendation to dump all the family responsibilities on the stay at home spouse though!
- Decide if your stay-at-home spouse will return to work when the kids enter school. My goal, in agreement with my wife, would be to engineer our life so that she won’t HAVE to return to work. If she choose to, great. If not, no major deal.
- Create a budget based on just the remaining income. We’ve been doing this for about 1/2 a year, and I am now confident that we can make ends meet on just my current income. I have my wife’s pay deposited in a completely separate account, so I’m absolutely 100% sure that we’re not spending any of that money. If you really want to go the extra mile on this step you might consider doing an emergency or worst-case budget just in case you lose your job or have to take a lower paying job.
- Discuss what’s really important and what could be potentially cut. My wife has wanted to be a stay at home mother her entire life. She would be willing to go to any extreme to accomplish this, including moving, living on a much lower income, dropping down to a one-car family, etc. Boy do I love this woman! That takes pressure off of me, and allows me to work hard and try to provide her with these “extras.”
Did I miss anything you would recommend?
Do any of you have other suggestions?
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9 Responses to “Preparations To Become A One-Income Family”
Becoming a one-income family is not as hard as people think. As you mentioned, cutting out unnecessary expenses, budgeting, and agreeing on primary responsibilities will solve most of the issues you will encounter. Ensure that you are on the same page, with regards to your goals (both financial and personal), and your life will be golden.
My wife has not worked outside the home (which is a much harder job than I have) since our son was born. It took about 3 months to get used to it, but now I never want her to go back to work unless that is something she wants to do.
By Dusty on Oct 29, 2008
Of course it’s a personal decision for everyone, but I view public work as fundamental to human well-being. I would never want to be excluded from such a realm of experience. Either/or situations (only work; only stay-at-home) are generally not going to be healthy for either partner. Public work provides much, much more than just an “income.” Why not consider both spouses working part-time or flex-time?
By MoneyEnergy on Oct 30, 2008
IMO, “staying-at-home” is no panacea (especially unpaid labour and with the kids) and shouldn’t be considered as the better alternative, as though the publicly working spouse is doing the stay-at-home spouse a favour of some sort by sparing him/her that public-life experience.
By MoneyEnergy on Oct 30, 2008
Good point MoneyEnergy. I completely agree that the stay at home parent will have the more difficult of the two jobs. And some people probably just aren’t built to be a stay at home parent, while others are.
I also like the idea about both spouses working part-time or flex-time, but that’s a more difficult setup to create for us. 2 part-time employees = no healthcare and 401k benefits in most situations, and it’s just my opinion but my guess is career progression and promotions would probably be less frequent. It’s a great idea though, and something to look out for if an opportunity arises.
By todd on Oct 31, 2008
I think preparing to be a one-income family is an AWESOME idea! And congrats on the new one on the way!! My wife is pregnant with our first child as well
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My wife and I agreed before we were married that we would NEVER rely on her income for everyday expenses. We both want her to be able to be a stay-at-home mom so she can homeschool our children and just be a mom.
She is finishing up her bachelors degree right now, and so her small income from some side jobs has all gone to help pay for her school (made the last payment this month!). We have never factored her income into our budget. And I will say that having a budget is crucial to staying on track financially!
By Justin Bergen "TheNightTrader" on Nov 2, 2008
Thanks for the comment Justin, and good luck with your little one as well. It definitely helps to create a baseline of spending that doesn’t require two incomes. It will also help you decide, in advance, what you’ll be doing with the second income if your wife ever decided to return to paid employment (being a mom I’m sure is a harder job than either of us have!). Good luck with the home schooling too. My wife and I are considering that as well. She’s not sold on the idea yet, but she was home schooled and she did teach in china for two years, so I think she can handle it.
By todd on Nov 3, 2008
Good for you for planning and praticing before the big event! My sister chose to become a SAHM when her kids were about 1 & 3. She and her husband figured it all out and discovered they had a small gap that needed to be filled. She found a one-day-a-week way to earn that missing, needed money. Her husband takes that day as one of his days off so they need no child care. She also home schools. Her kids are now 8 & 10 and I know the whole family remains happy and committed to their decision.
By Mary@SimplyForties on Nov 4, 2008